Monday, January 14

where to start?

the problem with writing for me has always been where to start. and today, the problem continues........
to start: 'among the wildflowers' names my blog (for those of you familiar with the tom petty tune) because a certain freedom resonates with me when i hear those lyrics. Maybe it was growing up in a small town where wildflowers bloomed during the first warm days of spring reminding me of the innocence of youth. Maybe wildflowers embrace new beginnings. or maybe it brings back the embarrassing, but true, memory of Fox network playing the tune on Party of Five when my serious crush, Griffin, had his last scene, driving off in a car never to return to the show. Either memory, Tom Petty's lyrics always induce an emotional response - a feat that not many songs can claim repeatedly. 'Among the wildflowers' makes me think of a sanctuary of contentment, a place we feel free. And in this crazy life, we all need a place to be free. this blog is my attempt to relate some the events and thoughts among my wildflowers. Enjoy my garden.

Today I realize that time has passed me by at an alarmingly fast r
ate since Kellen was born. i am seeing patients again and i can't remember what life was like before kellen. how easy it was to go to the office and do my job. but now, i can hear the faint sound of baby as i talk with patients about their health. They ask "how can you work when you hear your baby in the other room?" not out of irritation or concern, but more of the are you ready to be back here type of tone. And today i decided YES, i am ready. I feel inspired and energized when i am with patients. I can't imagine them in anyone else's hands. i have a lot to offer...i can tell when i answer their questions. Lights bulbs turn on, and they know they are in the right place at this moment. I know they are too. I'm glad i can share with them. I'm glad i have the opportunity to be with them. I share my time away from Kellen with courageous pregnant women, colicky newborns, impressive 5 year olds, women suffering with hormone changes, women suffering in general.....and i praise God that i can't imagine life any other way.

then i walk out of the treatment room and the sound of baby becomes ever so clear....around the corner i see

i think i can share my days with this guy. for today, we sat up on our own, cried, smiled and finally, our first blog. i'll save all the cool health stuff that keeps my brain buzzing for another day.
onwards & upwards


Gombojav Tribe said...

Your baby is so sweet!!

Marmie said...

Who said you can't write? You've got it going on